Awfulizing is Awful
Have you ever had The. Worst. Possible. Scenario ruminating in your mind? I have.
Much of my life has been spent thinking of the worst possible scenarios to events I was going through—the most horrific outcomes. And it just sparked more worry and fear like a disastrous merry-go-round or hamster wheel.
For example, I went through a period of assuming that a car was going to hit me when I crossed the street. I was overly cautious and would not go into the street, even when a car was a mile away. I’d wait until it passed. Then as I finally did cross the road, I would think of being hit. This caused severe anxiety, even panic at times—thinking that a car racing would fly out of nowhere and run me down, with no regard for human life.
I reached a point of being fed up and determined to change my ways. I began practicing a simple and powerful affirmation: “I am safe.”
At first, I did not believe it. As a matter of fact, I thought it was bullshit. But, I kept repeating it like a mantra. In weeks, I started saying it like I meant it. Months later, it fully kicked in and I felt comfortable walking across the street.
Another breeding ground for awfulizing and catastrophizing negative thoughts are health issues. I’ve got a headache twice this week—-What if it’s cancer? What if after I sprained my ankle, I’m going to walk funny for the rest of my life?
Other “favorites”: What if I go crazy if I have a medication change? What if my friend is dead because she hasn’t called me back? And on and on and on.
It’s one thing to be vigilant and caring--- but to be neurotically worried and assuming the worst is going to happen—now that is pathologically insanity-making and creates unnecessary stress in your life. Your energy is caught up in assuming that the future is going to be a horrible place for you. This is just not true.
On a trip to New York City, my favorite Uncle Rich once told me: “You know, Lisa, most things work out.”
I learned in that moment that you just have to tell yourself that everything is going to work out and trust that it will. To have faith in life and to live in the moment instead of the future.
There is great relief when doing this, even if you don’t fully believe it yourself. IT is the potential and possibility that this could be true. My amazing Uncle is right. Things tend to work themselves out!
Look around you. Look at the people you care about—your family and friends. Look at the bumps in the road that come up for them. Most of the time—what happens? IT ALL WORKS OUT. So if it can all work out for them, it can all work out for you. Just trust and repeat after me: “It’s all going to work out.”
