29 Tips to get out of bed
Have you ever had difficulty getting out of bed? Have you vacillated between getting up and starting, only to crawl back into bed with the covers over your head, wanting to just sleep more or hide from the world? Have you ever mentally and physically felt so exhausted that the only option (or so you thought) was to go back to sleep?
When I was living in Chicago in 2007, I experienced the worst depression of my life. On top of that I was experiencing severe flashbacks from Complex PTSD. The depression was life threatening and the last thing I wanted to do was get up. I’d sleep all day, not even getting up to bathe. I’d skip meals and feed the depression by staring at the walls then plummeting into more escaping sleep. After 8 months of this, and spending time in a mental ward for suicidality, I became very angry and decided to fight for my life.
It wasn’t perfect. I worked my ass off though. Sometimes I’d take a few steps back. Sleep for a few days. Then I’d grin bear it and take some action, that seemed to go against everything cell in my body. What it boils down when it comes to mental disease is…are you ready to fight for your life?
Here are some tips that not only will help you get up but will support getting ready and showing up for your day--whether you feel like it or not.
1. Bookending with a friend
Bookending is marking the beginning of a goal with a text or phone call then marking accomplishment of that goal with another text or phone call. How this works is you tell someone before you take action and then tell that person after you have finished. This not only creates accountability but also a space to celebrate your successful accomplishment afterwards. For example, you could text a supportive person that you are going to work. Then when you get to work, you can text them that you did it. In the case of getting up. Go and text a supportive friend that you have woke up and will get ready for your day. After you’ve successfully done it, text that you are “Ready to go!”
2. .Put the alarm clock across the room
You are positioning yourself to walk to the other side of the room to turn the thing off. This is a big step---standing up. Before you roll back into bed, do the next step to get ready instead.
3. Make your bed
Not only does doing this discourage you from getting back into bed, it also can be your first accomplishment of the day. Making the effort to clean your space with an intention to get moving into your day can be a powerful way to confidently move forward.
4. Splash cold water on your face
Anything involving cold water is a refreshing shock to the system. Definitely an eyeopener. It can cause the fog of sleepiness to dissipate quickly.
5. Prepare for your day the night before
Pick out your clothes, make your lunch, straighten up and do the dishes. Doing all of this promotes success and calibrates your willingness to have a fabulous tomorrow. It adds to your vision of making the next day a soothe-sailing morning, plus you have a few less things to worry about or decide on.
6. Positive affirmations:
Say to yourself, on a daily and nightly basis, preferably out loud: “I am showing up for my life. I am competent and confident. I will have a great day.”
Make up some of your own affirmations. Be sure they are in the present tense and in the positive. Put them on index cards or sticky notes and put them above your bathroom sink or at another strategic location easily viewable to say every morning.
7. Change negative thoughts:
Are you awfulizing and catastophizing first thing when you get up? When you notice yourself dreading the day ahead, direct your attention to a positive memory, a safe beautiful place you’ve been to, or a supportive person. Now, focus on remembering all the positive attributes. Let your mind go to this positive place or supportive person.. Think of all the details. Imagine a blank canvas in your mind and you are painting onto it the details of the positive place or person and the fondest of memories with them. Pause. Now feel it. Next, smile and get ready!
8. Write the pros and cons of getting up
Act like a lawyer. Get out a piece of paper and write a line down the middle of it, creating two columns. At the top write “Pros” on one side and “Cons” on the other. Now, brainstorm a list of reasons that would be beneficial for you to get up and participate in the day ahead. On the other side, brainstorm a list of reasons it would not be beneficial to get up and get going. Get another piece of paper--draw the same lines and write the pros and cons of not starting your day. Read over your evidence. Then begin your day.
9. Do some breathwork
Set an alarm for 3minutes. While keeping your eyes open, do some combat breathing, or square breathing: inhale for a count of four, hold for a count of four, exhale for a count of four, hold for a count of four. Repeat.
Another great exercise is an energizing breath. Open your mouth and inhale as if you are sucking a piece of spaghetti through a straw. The exhale is also through the mouth and fells like dropping a box of bricks onto the ground. A total release. So the active part of the breath is on the inhale and the exhale is passive. Set your alarm for 3 minutes. After you’re done, you’ll feel as alert as if you just finished drinking a couple shots of espresso!
10. Go for a Quick Walk
Getting out into the fresh air always makes you feel better and can be a great way to start the day. Do it mindfully. Look around you. Note what you see. Note what you smell and hear. It doesn’t have to be a five mile walk--just 15 min or around a block or two will brighten the beginning of your day.
11. Do what works
When you get home from having a decent day, brainstorm what got you there. Think about your morning routine. What did you utilize that worked? Add it to an ongoing list. Review the list on the days that you are having a challenging time---and do them.
12. Mindfulness meditation
Set a timer for 5 minutes before you go to bed or upon waking. Bring your attention to your natural breathing. Don’t exaggerate or change the way you breathe. When you notice your thoughts drift, acknowledge what your thought is, then bring your attention back to your breath. That’s it.
Meditation not only helps you to sleep better by quieting the monkey mind (or busy overthinking mind), but also helps you to respond instead of react to any situation. Sleeping deep is a good setup for a great day ahead. The calm of the meditation can carry into the next day and beyond.
13. Play it out--if you go to work vs. if you stay home
Bottom line: How are you going to feel?
When you feel like not getting up, play it out in your mind and see where it goes. If it looks like you’ll sleep all day or as long as you can, then stare at the walls the rest of the time in your dirty night clothes, feeling guilty and shameful--is it worth it?
What about going to your volunteer work or job and sticking to your schedule? Even if you don’t feel super awesome. Following it through in your mind, you’ll see that even on your worst off-feeling active day--still participating in your day is way better than not starting your day at all.
14. Take it one day at a time.
Tell yourself: “Just for today, I will go to work. Just for today, I will get up and get moving.”
All you have is today. Stay present with it and make it manageable. Sometimes, it’s figuring out what to do this hour, this minute at a time.
15. What do you love about your job or routine?
Brainstorm the night before what aspects you like about your job or daily routine. Say them outloud, then jump out of bed and dance to the coffee maker. If you can remind yourself what positive things will happen if you follow through with your plans, then you will gravitate toward showing up for your life to reap the benefits.
16. Enjoy a cup of tea/coffee
This can be an enjoyable part of your morning routine. It’s nurturing to have a cup of hot tea of coffee in your hands to pause for a moment and get centered. It’s a simple nurturing act of pleasure and self-care to put a warm mug of something delicious in front of you as you wake up.
17. Celebrate every time you show up for your day
It’s really important to celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how big or small. It does not have to be a huge present or an expensive outing. You can allow yourself to work on a fun project in the evening, go for a walk, meet up to have coffee with a friend or invite them over for tea. You can sit on your porch and read a magazine or book.
18. Feelings aren’t facts
If you do not feel like doing something, recognize that this feeling is not necessarily a fact. It is healthy to identify and acknowledge your emotions. Pay close attention to when you start telling yourself that you “don’t feel” like going, or “don’t feel” like getting up. Take the best next action step to get going. This may not be based on your feelings, but on what next baby step will point you in the direction of what you’d like to accomplish, such as starting your day, getting out of bed.
19. Tell someone when you don’t want to start your day. Tell a supportive person you don’t feel like going to work. Do this while laying in bed if you have to. Admitting where you’re at to someone opens you up to their encouragement and suggestions. Being honest opens up solutions because you are no longer in a fantasy that staying in bed all day is a good idea. Accountability is real. Once you agree to tell on yourself, that supportive person can hold you accountable for what you say you are going to do, encouraging you to back up your words with action.
20. Change out of your pajamas and into your day clothes
Let’s face it. Slumber wear is way more comfy than day clothes. It’s a good reason in the morning to play the part---get out of your pajamas! ASAP. Change into a fresh outfit. You want to play the part, and obviously you’re not going to go to your day job wearing your jammies. Changing into fresh and clean day clothes can get you in the mood and propel yourself to continue to get ready to participate in your day. Play the part, dress the part. Suit up and show up, as they say.
21. Music makes the world go round and wakes you up too
Upbeat music not only wakes you up but can put you in a better mood. Turn up the music, if you can, or spend a few minutes with your headphones on to listen, tap and sing along. Upbeat music can not only wake you up but can put you in a better mood. Jam out. Leaving music on while you take a shower can be very energizing. Sing in the shower! Then get ready to have a great day.
22. What are you grateful for?
Take a deep breath. List 3 things you are grateful for, big or small. Write them down in a notebook, and add to it each day. Another 3 things. When we’re in the state of gratitude we put ourselves in the present where fear cannot exist at the same time. Open your eyes and declare what you’re grateful out loud if. Communicate your gratitude in whatever ways you can so that they become front stage center. Carry your gratitude, like a precious gift, with you throughout the day.
23. Act “as if” and Fake it ‘til you Make It
Get up out of bed, as if you are getting up for the day. . Act as if you are going to start getting ready--Jump up and get in the shower. Imagine and act as if you are getting ready and making breakfast. Make breakfast. Act as if you are functioning enough to make it through your day; fake it ‘til you make it! Act as if you are enjoying your morning. See what happens. You can do this! Once you start buying into the fake it ‘til you make it idea, next thing you know, you are doing it: getting ready to start your day.
24. Identify something you can look forward to
Deliberately scan your day and look for that one thing you enjoy most. It could be seeing the happy face of a co-worker, it could be that break when you walk around the block feeling the sunshine hitting your face, it could be the bus ride, staring out the window in a peaceful state. It could be calling a friend after work or inviting someone over to have some tea; it could be doing some art or watching a show after your work day. Could be cooking or performing the actual job at your volunteer position and that feeling of getting out of your head. Hold onto that thing---let it propel you forward to get out of bed to start the day---you won’t regret it.
25. Laughter is the best medicine
Think of something ridiculously funny. Watch a cat video. Collect them ahead of time. Who says the morning is not for late-night standup? Put some on or simply make the sounds of laughing. In laughter yoga…..there is evidence that merely making the sounds of laughing can have a positive impact on your day. Laughter can move you into a good mood. It can lighten the load of depression. You may have to “act as if” at first, but once you get going, the laughter will keep pouring.
26. Listen to a positive podcast, or read a daily devotion
Words can inspire...and wake you up! Blast it and get up, give it your full attention after making the morning drink of your choice. Get one of those books with short readings for each day of the year. Listen to an uplifting podcast. They are out there waiting to cheer you up and cheer you on!
27. Break the fast
Most likely, you’ve been sleeping for a while and haven’t eaten since the evening before. That can lead to anxiety and exhaustion. Nutrients can perk us up, make us more focused and alert. The night before, you can plan and plot out your morning meal. Be thoughtful about what you will put into your body. Be deliberate about feeding yourself good foods. You won’t regret it!
28. Imagine what they would say
Bring to mind a mentor, a supportive teacher or good friend or supportive family member. Now, imagine they are the size of a squirrel sitting on your shoulder. What advice would they give you right now about starting your day, or in general? Take their advice and get a movin’!!
29. Let the light pour in!
Turn on the lights and open the curtains. It’s time to not only wake up but to create an environment conducive to getting up and having a beautiful morning, even if you don’t feel like it. Don't let the darkness invite you back under the covers! Just do the opposite and flip that light switch on. Bring in as much light as possible!
With mental health conditions or addiction recovery, getting up can be a challenge. Utilize your skills, push yourself in a loving way. Give yourself this day to engage in. You deserve it!
C. 2020 by Lisa Jo Barr, excerpt from upcoming book