Self respect and love and the blessings and gratitude I have for my life I am living today, help me to not use. It is not appealing to destroy what I have worked so hard to create. My desire to stay grounded in the present. I know that if I started using again, it would just open a can of worms and it would be a cycle of lethal self-destruction and that the disease picks up where it left off and just gets worse from there. I would not want to lose the control I have to relentlessly pursue something I am powerless over like compulsive sex, drug and cigarette use, etc. I want to be a positive inspiration to others and help others and when you are not helping yourself, you cannot effectively do this. I want to continue to move into my goals and dreams instead of into the fear and chaos of addiction.